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It's Settled.

Our wrongful death case is officially settled.

Legally, I'm not allowed to speak about specifics. I will say it was less than we hoped, but that's part of the whole 'mediation' thing. We're all just glad it's finally over and done with.

Next week we go to speak to someone about structured annuities, which would give us money every year and help keep that money tax-free (as opposed to if we just took a lump some and invested it ourselves). Josh and I have some decisions to come to before then. Mainly, I think we want to move. Our neighborhood has been getting steadily worse since new landlords took over, so we need to get out. I need to get away from this place, because everywhere around Asheville is just too full of mom.

But we have time.

Thank you guys so, so much for all your prayers and support during all this.

Comments

( 61 comments — Leave a comment )
peaceofpie
Jul. 20th, 2009 09:48 pm (UTC)
*hugs*

Personally, I vote that you should move to Indiana. :D
ahavah
Jul. 20th, 2009 09:51 pm (UTC)
Aw, thanks! I think we want to stay near mountains, but we'll consider it. :) Our biggest criteria is actually that we're able to have a farm, and that the state has good homeschooling laws. It'll be hard to top NC, to be honest. We'd like a chance though. :) We may just move to a different NC-area. We'll see.
(no subject) - peaceofpie - Jul. 20th, 2009 10:01 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ahavah - Jul. 20th, 2009 10:14 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - peaceofpie - Jul. 20th, 2009 10:27 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ahavah - Jul. 20th, 2009 10:44 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - peaceofpie - Jul. 20th, 2009 11:04 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ahavah - Jul. 20th, 2009 11:21 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - peaceofpie - Jul. 20th, 2009 11:26 pm (UTC) - Expand
kali_kali
Jul. 20th, 2009 10:14 pm (UTC)
*hugs* Good to know it is settled.

Are you still considering the RV road trip that you'd mentioned to me awhile back as something you'd pursue once a settlement was reached? Or have the motorbikes won out? :)
ahavah
Jul. 20th, 2009 10:19 pm (UTC)
Thank you!

We are kinda-sorta considering the road trip. I don't think we'll be able to buy an RV, but we do want to get sidecars and take the bikes. We definitely want to get some traveling done before we settle down anywhere.
oh_asphyxie
Jul. 20th, 2009 10:14 pm (UTC)
I'm so glad that you were able to reach an agreement, even if it was less than you hoped for. Good luck with talking to someone about structured annuities. :)
ahavah
Jul. 20th, 2009 10:26 pm (UTC)
Thanks so much! I'm honestly very glad that we reached an agreement too. We wouldn't have if we didn't feel it was acceptable, or at least close to it. I'm actually kind of looking forward to the annuity thing. Since we've signed the agreement forms, we can pretty much structure it however we want. I'm going to try really hard to learn about money management! I mean, I've been trying to educated myself on that anyway, but I imagine it's different once you actually have some to try it with. ;)
machate
Jul. 20th, 2009 11:01 pm (UTC)
Glad it's over. Texas is nice. Hot, but nice. and it's not overly expensive like lots of places. There's ample work in/around the larger cities depending on what you guys 'do'.
ahavah
Jul. 20th, 2009 11:15 pm (UTC)
Thanks! Our goal is to have a farm, so I'm not too sure about Texas. But we'd like to go out west first, since we've never been. (Well, I lived in Arizona when I was three, but I don't remember all that much.) We would probably go through Texas, since I have a cousin out in NM.

Texas - catku - Jul. 21st, 2009 12:32 am (UTC) - Expand
Re: Texas - ahavah - Jul. 21st, 2009 12:35 am (UTC) - Expand
jovial_kitten
Jul. 20th, 2009 11:12 pm (UTC)
Glad it's over. I can totally understand not wanting to live in asheville anymore.
ahavah
Jul. 20th, 2009 11:18 pm (UTC)
Thanks! Me too.

Yeah, I mean I really love Asheville, but it's just too hard. Josh has lived here his whole life, and I've lived all around here with mom. If I go anywhere in Enka, Fletcher, Hendersonville, Fairview, Black Mtn, etc...it's just literally everywhere has something. I really think a fresh start would do me a world of good. I'm used to moving anyway, ha ha, and this is the longest I've ever been stuck in one place. It would be good to start over again someplace new.
thefoxglovelady
Jul. 21st, 2009 12:30 am (UTC)
*hugs* Congratulations on whatever good can come of all this, and I hope that things start getting better and better for you and your dear ones. A fresh start in Greenville made a world of difference for me, and I hope yours does the same good for you! *hugs*
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 12:32 am (UTC)
Thank you so much! I like to think it will all be okay. I'm trying to be proactive in making that happen.
catku
Jul. 21st, 2009 12:35 am (UTC)
I hope that you will be able to find a measure of peace now. There is no compensating for her loss but at least this part is over.

*hugs*
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 12:36 am (UTC)
Very true words. Thank you very much! I've been trying to do more healing and get back to a brighter center. I like to think it's been working, and that it's helped.
badgerbear
Jul. 21st, 2009 12:40 am (UTC)
*hugs* You are in my thoughts! I'm glad this is coming to a close, and hope that you find a lovely new place to move to. :)
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 12:42 am (UTC)
Thank you! I very much hope so. And I'll definitely need a new tat to celebrate, even if it's not the big backpiece I had in mind. :) If you're still game!
(no subject) - badgerbear - Jul. 21st, 2009 12:55 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ahavah - Jul. 21st, 2009 12:56 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - badgerbear - Jul. 21st, 2009 01:36 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ahavah - Jul. 21st, 2009 02:16 am (UTC) - Expand
miintikwa
Jul. 21st, 2009 12:58 am (UTC)
Um... congrats?

I don't know if that's the right thing to say! I'm relieved for you!
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 01:00 am (UTC)
Thank you! I think that works fine. Many people lose their mothers with no gain whatsoever, and so in some ways we are blessed. I appreciate it!
(no subject) - miintikwa - Jul. 21st, 2009 01:04 am (UTC) - Expand
solestria
Jul. 21st, 2009 12:59 am (UTC)
I'm glad for your closure, and I'll keep you in my thoughts for the best structured annuity plan for you. I'm sorry to hear you're moving--let's meet up before that happens!
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 01:02 am (UTC)
You're so kind. Thank you! I would love to meet up, and now that I'm fairly good on the bike, I could do it just about any time. Not tomorrow, but any time after that. Just let me know.
theafaye
Jul. 21st, 2009 01:16 am (UTC)
Thank goodness that's all over and you can look forward to building a future without this worry looming over you.

Two letters winging their way to you today. They took a little longer than expected because of a delay over getting photos printed but my son is always talking about "my friend Eden" and how he wants to come and visit her.
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 02:14 am (UTC)
Amen! Thank you for all the kind thoughts.

Eden will be glad to have word, although I told her that since she made a request, you might have had to get pictures done. She'll be glad to know he agreed! I'll tell her what you said, and I bet that will make her day. She tells everyone about Seth too.
(Deleted comment)
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 02:08 pm (UTC)
Thank you! It is a bit strange. It feels really bad prospering from it, but I know that if mom chose to leave like that, she would want some good to come of it.
lanternlady
Jul. 21st, 2009 11:49 am (UTC)
Hey lady... I"m glad this is now done and you can all move forward. Yanno, if travelling, Canada is a lovely place to visit :)

xoxo
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 02:15 pm (UTC)
Thank you so much! I'm very much hoping to visit Canada one day. I would love to get to meet you!
medievalneedle
Jul. 21st, 2009 01:57 pm (UTC)
I am glad it is over for you. Usually mediation ends with both sides a little dissatisfied and that means it was a good mediation and y'all met in the middle!
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 02:18 pm (UTC)
Thank you very much! Yeah, that seems to be about right, so I guess it was a good one. It wasn't quite the middle, but it seemed to be the best we could do without going to trial. Frankly, I would have rather, but my sisters really didn't want to go through that. So I am content.
(no subject) - medievalneedle - Jul. 21st, 2009 02:29 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ahavah - Jul. 21st, 2009 02:30 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - medievalneedle - Jul. 21st, 2009 02:33 pm (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ahavah - Jul. 21st, 2009 02:35 pm (UTC) - Expand
plastrickland23
Jul. 21st, 2009 02:53 pm (UTC)
Guess it's good to be able to put it all behind you as much as possible. Take care. P.
ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 03:26 pm (UTC)
Yes indeed. It may still be a long process, but I'm glad to be working through it a bit better. I think getting out of this neighborhood will help. I'm looking forward to it. Thank you!
(no subject) - plastrickland23 - Jul. 21st, 2009 03:47 pm (UTC) - Expand
brihanon
Jul. 21st, 2009 05:36 pm (UTC)
I just kind of skimed through the comments, but when you move seems like a good day to call your new birthday, new every thing including a DOB.

Virginia has mountains, and a large home school community. I've thought about starting a home school co-op where secondary classes would be offered and feild trips shared and knowledge is celebrated instead of the almighty SOL

ahavah
Jul. 21st, 2009 10:25 pm (UTC)
That's a very good idea! Thank you! I will definitely consider it. Now we're kind of thinking that we'll stay near Asheville for a year or two and go to school first, but I'd still be getting out of this neighborhood. A brand new beginning, anyway! I may do that.

Virginia is one of the places we talked about. It seems very similar to NC, although I've really only driven through. I'd love to check a couple of places out.
(no subject) - times_suspended - Jul. 22nd, 2009 01:40 am (UTC) - Expand
times_suspended
Jul. 22nd, 2009 01:38 am (UTC)
I'm glad the legal aspects have been settled.

Now, you begin considering and planning and pulling dreams out of the air. A blank slate, mostly, and what you draw on it is of your choosing. That's refreshing & scary, too. I'm thinking of you and your mom. <3
ahavah
Jul. 22nd, 2009 12:13 pm (UTC)
Boy, do you have it right! I don't even know where exactly to begin, and there's so much opportunity, but I'm really nervous and for some reason extra pissed about it.

At any rate, as always, I so appreciate your insight and love. *hugs* Hey! High on my list of before-the-end-of-the-year things is to head to IL to see Grandma. Do you think I could stop in and see you while we're in that neck of the woods?
(no subject) - times_suspended - Jul. 23rd, 2009 02:20 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - times_suspended - Jul. 23rd, 2009 02:23 am (UTC) - Expand
(no subject) - ahavah - Jul. 23rd, 2009 02:33 am (UTC) - Expand
trystan830
Jul. 22nd, 2009 03:41 am (UTC)
oh.... wow. *hugs*
ahavah
Jul. 22nd, 2009 12:14 pm (UTC)
*hugs*
butterfly_bbw
Jul. 22nd, 2009 03:55 pm (UTC)
I am very happy to hear your news. Good luck finding a new place.
HUGS!!
ahavah
Jul. 22nd, 2009 03:58 pm (UTC)
Thanks so very much!
( 61 comments — Leave a comment )

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