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Huge Friends Cut Coming

Given some huge breaches of confidence that I've had lately, I think it's past time to do some clean up on my journal. It's years overdue. I have become more paranoid about what I post here, which has actually stopped me from posting a lot anymore, and I really need this to be my safe space again. I will be doing a very major friends cut this week, and I'll also be redoing several of my filters.

I only plan to cut journals which have not been updated in 2+ years (no matter how close we used to be 6-7 years ago; if I haven't heard from you in years, I hope you'll understand), and people with whom I've grown apart or just haven't connected to very well.

I'm on the fence about people I'm still connected with on facebook or other sites but whom I never hear from here. I'm leaning towards removing here, not because I don't want to be friends at all, but because there's no real reason to keep a bunch of people on who have left LJ. And a LOT of people have left LJ. If you're still reading and I just didn't realize it, feel free to let me know if I removed you in error.

I'd like this to be a place where I feel comfortable baring my soul again, and I want to post a lot more here. I find myself not doing that anymore, and the only way I feel to fix that is to make sure I really know everyone who is on here and exactly who has access to it.

If anyone wants to take this opportunity to remove me, please feel free, and thank you for the time we spent together. If we chat at all these days, you really have nothing to worry about. I've just 150 friends and only real active friendships with way less than that. This is my family/soul sharing space, and I just need to be careful lately who I'm sharing my innermost personal things with.

Thanks for understanding!

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( 27 comments — Leave a comment )
lanternlady
Mar. 10th, 2013 02:40 pm (UTC)
i have recently done a similar cull on FB and am thinking its time here too. i do have several filters because there are something i share with only the most bare bones people.. so i totally get you love! xo
ahavah
Mar. 10th, 2013 02:47 pm (UTC)
Thanks, W. I could probably stand to do a better cull on FB too, but I did do a huge one there not too long ago. I've neglected LJ for far too long. I'll probably redo a lot of things this year, I think.

Thanks for the love & support! ♥
maiabee8
Mar. 10th, 2013 03:00 pm (UTC)
That's a smart idea... I probably should do something similar.
ahavah
Mar. 10th, 2013 03:10 pm (UTC)
I used to do it a lot more regularly, but I've slacked on LJ too much. Battening down the hatches is the only way I'll be able to really pick it back up again, I think.
theafaye
Mar. 10th, 2013 03:00 pm (UTC)
I am all for anything which sees more posting on LJ. It's getting awful quiet in these here parts...
ahavah
Mar. 10th, 2013 03:12 pm (UTC)
IKR? I'm trying! It's been really hard for me to feel safe here after having issues with people on all of my most trusted, inner-me filters. I'm really trying to get past that and not let it chase me off. I miss the really deep connections this place gave me. I need those back.
mrsgirlyduck
Mar. 10th, 2013 04:33 pm (UTC)
I've been thinking of doing the same thing. Especially since I've been posting so much lately about all the problems Dane an I are having. I'm just not comfortable with some people here on Lj knowing such very private things.
ahavah
Mar. 10th, 2013 04:37 pm (UTC)
Same here! Unfortunately, I misjudged some people, and then I've kept a bunch of folks on who I used to be SO close with but haven't heard from in years. A lot has happened in those years, too. I'm taking a 'better safe than sorry' approach these days. Tired of being sorry all the time. :/

I really hope things improve for you. *big hugs* I've not posted about a lot of stuff that's been going on here for those same reasons.
mrsgirlyduck
Mar. 10th, 2013 05:30 pm (UTC)
Thanks :) I have faith it'll work out for both of us!! We've gone through to much crap for the universe not to let it work out, right?

I just went through and cut more than 2/3rds of my f-list. Shocking how few people post anymore.
salleesuewho
Mar. 10th, 2013 06:18 pm (UTC)
I think you are smart in choosing to clear out the negative and untrustworthy and making your space yours again.

I've neglected my LJ for WAY too long. I'm really starting to get tired of facebook and should really come back to LJ more.

ahavah
Mar. 10th, 2013 09:00 pm (UTC)
I hope you do! I'm both fb- and lj-jaded atm, but I'm trying to get back into the swing of it here.
njlorelei
Mar. 10th, 2013 07:57 pm (UTC)
I've always kept my LJ circle of friends pretty small. I don't necessarily post a ton of personal stuff but when I do I like to know my audience. FB I feel is more for the masses and while every now and then I remove someone annoying I never post anything there that I feel is personal.
ahavah
Mar. 10th, 2013 09:01 pm (UTC)
See, I was the opposite way at first, because FB is connected to my real name and I post all my kid pictures and stuff there. I've tightened it up over there pretty well though. I just need to do the same here in order to really feel comfortable posting, well, pretty much anything anymore.
hollzilla
Mar. 10th, 2013 10:37 pm (UTC)
This is a great idea - I really should do something like this to my own LJ, especially since I haven't been paying attention to but it was a huge help for the year when I lived with five people, haha. Gonna try to make it a goal to start using it often - I'm always reading my friend list though.
ahavah
Mar. 11th, 2013 01:35 pm (UTC)
Seems like lots of people are trying to use theirs more. I hope so! It's been a bit dead around here lately. I'm just as bad. I do read when I have time, but I'm so used to the "like" culture of FB that I hardly comment anymore. I'm trying to get better!
hollzilla
Mar. 11th, 2013 10:34 pm (UTC)
Definitely - it feels like I'm disconnecting from all of my friends on fb since there's the 'like' button. I want to have some form of communication with my friends in the way of words.
atemu_girl
Mar. 10th, 2013 11:33 pm (UTC)
I haven't been very good in the LJ department lately either ^^; But I would definitely like to stay. I do enjoy reading your posts :)
ahavah
Mar. 11th, 2013 01:36 pm (UTC)
Thank you! You have nothing to worry about. :D I've not been very good myself, but I'm hoping this will help me improve and feel a bit better about LJ.
atemu_girl
Mar. 12th, 2013 12:31 am (UTC)
I've neglected my LJ shamefully ^^; I blame work, and also just the fact I simply couldn't be bothered. One of these days I'm going to have to make a post to remind people I'm still alive!
dragynflies
Mar. 11th, 2013 02:10 am (UTC)
I don't post much but I see you on FB and read your posts here :)
ahavah
Mar. 11th, 2013 01:38 pm (UTC)
You have nothing to worry about! I do hope you might keep posting here though. I'm trying to slowly wean myself away from FB. I'm doing well so far. I still check in every now and then, but not all day every day,and I'm no longer so anal about catching up all the way to the last posts I saw. FB just isn't that important (imo), and I realized I had to stop treating it like it was. lol
muse0fire
Mar. 11th, 2013 03:52 pm (UTC)
I don't update my LJ anymore, but I do come back and read the feed about once a week. If you don't mind keeping me, that would be great, but it's your decision!
ahavah
Mar. 11th, 2013 05:54 pm (UTC)
I'll definitely keep you on! I'm glad to know you're still around. ♥
brihanon
Mar. 11th, 2013 05:54 pm (UTC)
please let me lurk, I miss your posts and I do comment some tomes. even thugh we've not met, I can feel a connection.
ahavah
Mar. 11th, 2013 05:55 pm (UTC)
Definitely! I'm sorry that I've gotten so crappy with it, but I'm doing my best to improve.
lynndrena
Mar. 24th, 2013 04:06 pm (UTC)
hey
Just wanted to say that I love you!
ahavah
Mar. 24th, 2013 08:10 pm (UTC)
Re: hey
I love you too! Thank you. ♥
( 27 comments — Leave a comment )

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